Archives for posts with tag: WP LONGFORM

Don’t let the tall weeds cast a shadow on the beautiful flowers in your garden.” 
― Steve Maraboli

REFLECTIONS

I’ve been back on Vancouver Island for 5 days, during which time I have sunk deeper and deeper into myself. In the past, I’ve always found my way back to the light by listening to my heart and watching for symbolic offerings from the Unified Field. This present journey into the dark will be no different. Fortunately, transformation is in Inverse Proportion to the depth of the descent…the deeper and darker the cave, the more profound the resulting shift in perspective. I felt the first glimmers of  ‘new life’ during the Spring Equinox of March. For the first time in my life I felt a natural flow of energy, rather than willful productivity. My behaviour was compassionate and loving without having to will myself to ‘Do the right thing’, and I felt aligned with Spirit. This lasted 3 days and then disappeared. To me, this experiential perfection was akin to a buried seedpod when it feels the earth’s first blush of warmth after months of winter snow. Awakened, the seed sends roots deeper into the dark, searching for sustenance. This growing network of roots will create a stable platform for the growing plant, allowing it to stand upright in summer bloom. I too was awakened by the warmth of the earth’s sun in my 3 days of bliss, but like the seed which has to dig deeper into the dark for sustenance and stability, I too have had darkness, struggle and emotional upheaval. Below is the most transcendent, life affirming time lapse video of an unfolding seedpod. This was created by the genius of Neil Bromhall. 

Resplendent is the result, but determination and desire are necessary in this arduous journey. When desperate, I think of the power it takes for the seed to push aside the earth so that it may bask in the glory and warmth of earth’s bounty. This inspires me to stay my course. Each bout of hopelessness and sorrow has been balanced by a counterpoint of burgeoning  new life.

Symbolic Offerings Helping Me Unearth ‘Her’ Grip

The Other Woman as Insidious Weed!

The Other Woman as Insidious Weed!

 The Other Woman as Insidious Weed

Although my garden was abloom upon my return from Alberta, it had also been infested. Surrounding each flower was a bevy of weeds, threatening to suffocate its very life. I dropped to my knees and began to cry…the first sign that I was undergoing a psychic fracturing. 5 days of weeding, 5 days of isolation and darkness. Bewildered by the depth of my sorrow, I surrendered to the omniscience of The Universe and asked, “How do these choking weeds mimic my life? What is threatening my chance to bloom this summer?” And then I was blessed with a synchronistic insight. Metaphorically, I have been watering the weeds in my life. For years I have been paying far too much attention to ‘the other woman’ in the lives of my boyfriends or husbands, rather than giving voice to the woman hidden within me. Changing this entrenched perspective was the impetus for theotherwomanblog. I needed to drag this shameful subject out into the light of day. No longer did I want to suffer in silence, acting as though I could handle the betrayal…keeping calm and carrying on. So I created a stage from which I could view the 3 main characters involved in my drama. My hope was to humanize the demons and transform myself from victim to empowered woman.

I’ve had to unearth the pain, the scars and the wounds of infidelity and betrayal, and believe that I am still a worthwhile, beautiful woman capable of creating a fulfilling life.

I want to thank Neil Bromhall for giving me hope. His creations pulled me from the dark desolation of human transformation.

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In real love you want the other person’s good. In romantic love, you want the other person. 

Margaret Anderson

REFLECTIONS

ROMANTIC LOVE-YOU COMPLETE ME

For decades I have searched for the ‘you complete me‘ kind of love. Jonathan Livingston Seagull said and I believed Your soulmate is the one who makes life come to life‘! I even embraced the edicts from Love Story… ‘Love means never having to say you’re sorry.’ I wanted to gaze into the eyes of my one true love, sinking into the depths of his soul. We would be the swans and geese of love, swimming, flying, creating and mating as one, for a lifetime!

 I wanted to be the rainbow in his sky, his muse for artistic creations, the light of the moon in his darkest nights! I longed for a love in which we would lose ourselves in each other, and when apart our greatest desire would be to lose ourselves in each other yet again! Our love would be so all-embracing that we would dress in similar styles. Celebrity couples, then and now, idealize dressing as one.

IS THIS TRUE LOVE OR LOSS OF IDENTITY

DEBUNKING ROMANTIC LOVE

 My notion of love was a symbiotic union in which each person would flourish from their interdependency. I disregarded the opposing theory that symbiotic relationships tend more often to parasitism than mutualism. I believed we would be as one…an Eveready Battery,  perpetually re-energized because he was the negative to my positive…and yes, more often than not he was the negative to my positive! In the 20 years of living with my husband, I went from being a relatively healthy, self-suffient woman, to a bed-ridden, dependent arthritic. During this same period he flourished in his career, becoming well regarded and successful. Even though I have been apart from him for some years, it has taken dogged determination to learn to be different…to excavate, unearth and reveal the other woman within myself so as NOT to repeat this pattern. 

BLESSED ARE THE SIGNS FROM THE UNIVERSE

Since 2005, when I began to wake up, and take responsibility for my life, I’ve had to undergo metamorphosis after metamorphosis. The interesting and satisfying life I have now came because I had faith a better life existed for me and that I could and would find it. I am constantly blessed with helpful guideposts from the Universe. Over the last 6 months I have been  presented with a series of bird scenarios! First I saw a beautiful pair of swans swimming and canoodling in the bay near my cottage. Immediately, I sank into a reverie of my marriage, believing that I, just like the 2 birds before me, had had…almost…the perfect love. Self-delusion knows no bounds.

BIRD ENCOUNTER #1

Love-Two Moving as One!

Love-Two Moving as One!

I needed a severely disturbing image to shatter my long held fantasy… The Universe knew I would never find real love unless I let go of my desire for romantic love…and Voila! This is what I saw next! A Canada Goose, standing on the shore, immobilized due to the arrow through her foot.

BIRD ENCOUNTER #2

Me As Wounded Goose - Alone

Me As Wounded Goose – Alone

Synchronicity at its finest…(when an external event spontaneously unfolds before one’s eyes and  resonates wildly, unexpectedly and thankfully, with some heretofore unconscious, internal archetypal process, this is synchronicity). The heart wrenching horror of this goose’s debacle spoke directly to my soul. Instantly, I was identifying with this goose. She was alone, in her moment of desperation, abandoned by her partner. And then I remembered the legend of Cupid! He carries 2 types of arrows; some with sharp golden points, others with blunt points of lead. According to the legend, if wounded by Cupid’s golden arrow, you feel uncontrollable desire, but if wounded by the blunt lead arrow, you feel only an aversion for the partner and you have an insatiable desire to flee. Suddenly, I comprehended my marriage. I had been wounded by a golden arrow, but it seemed that my husband had been wounded by the lead. This myth made as much sense as any therapist’s analysis…I felt uncontrollable, unfathomable desire…while he had flown the coop, metaphorically speaking. This bird awakened in me a need to examine my notions of love in marriage, but left me feeling sorry for myself…more victim than heroine. So naturally I had more encounters with the Canada Goose…my Spirit Guide.

BIRD ENCOUNTER #3

 Hey Lady!

Hey Lady!

Last week I photographed a Canadian Goose staring at me from the rooftop of a nearby Condo. As I was feeling lost and forlorn, I projected these feelings onto the bird. I thought this goose had become separated from her life-long mate and was hoping to learn a few coping strategies from me. I showed this bird that the best way to deal with her situation was to follow my lead…just wallow in self pity accompanied by the goose equivalent of a stash of Oh Henry bars and wine! I spent the next several days wondering when I would be rescued from my misery by my Prince. But once again, The Universe intervened. What happened next was miraculous! Forget the Prince sister…

 BIRD ENCOUNTER #4

Hey Lady, Don't Project Your S**T Onto Me!

Hey Lady, Don’t Project Your S**T Onto Me!

Oh My God! My poor, lost and forlorn goose was standing in the doorway, blocking the entrance to my condo, forcing me to interact with it. “You sad, sad thing. You are so alone,”  I said aloud. Upon hearing my consoling, pitiful clucks, she turned and glared at me…

BIRD ENCOUNTER #5

I COMPLETE ME, WOMAN!

I COMPLETE ME, WOMAN!

 “You’re the silly goose, Lady!  Just cause I’m out wandering doesn’t mean I’m lost! I wanted to be alone today! I left him back at the reservoir so I could have a day to fulfill my own desires! Oh Ya, one other thing you got wrong about me. The other evening when I was staring at you from the rooftop, I wasn’t looking for any of your advice…I was trying to give you some.”

REAL LOVE – I COMPLETE ME

And then the light dawned. Love means being able to stand alone, contented in solitude. Real love, not romantic, cloying love will find me just like the Goose did! But first I must be  confident in my capacity to find purpose, spiritual and material wealth and contentedness utilizing my own resources. I  MUST COMPLETE ME!

I tried to hug my Spiritual Guide, but she sauntered away… her job was done…an empowered woman may have been reward enough!

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